In The Lab Part 1
by rexhamster1
Summary: Hidan had lost hope in his lord, Jashin. But he has recently been released from his underground prison, and he was brought to a hospital. He has poked and probed in every nook and cranky. He wonders why he is there, but no one tells.


Jashin... Why did I ever think that you could help me? The only thing you could help me is dying... I do wish I were dead though... Truly, I want to die.

I wanted to die so much that day, but now, I'm glad I didn't.

bBeep... Beep... Beep... Beep.../b

That was all I could hear when I woke up. I couldn't hear the nurse talking, nor did I hear the birds outside the window. I just heard that slow, steady beep. I could barely hear, and to make things worse, I lost vision too. When I opened my eyes, everything was a blur, half blind some said. All I wanted was food and water, but I couldn't ask, for all the calls for help left me mute for a little... Looking back, I was a deaf-blind-mute... I hated that.

The nurse, who I only saw as a hazy excuse for a blob, seemed to be talking to me. But still overwhelmed by the new surroundings.

"Doctor! The patient is awake!" She yelled, rushing to the door. Her voice, I heard that very clearly.

A person, who turned out to be the doctor, came to my bed side. My eyes strained to make out any facial features. I could only see her long blond hair.

"So Hidan... Did you like your punishment?"

That voice pained me. I knew that voice, vaguely, but I still knew it. I could not remember why I remembered it though.

"I have to say, I'm surprised that you've survived in your hole all these years."

Yes, she did say years... I was incarcerated for years. (You'll learn how many years later.)

"We freed you from that hole for a reason, but that will come later. In the mean time, just look forward to getting better." She must've left because I couldn't see her anymore.

It would be while until I saw heard anyone I knew again.

More time, just a few days, went by. I could move, and talk, but it would hurt. Plus. They had done many tests on me. Blood tests, Liver function tests, tests for different illnesses, urine test, and, finally, they gave me a vision test.

The doctors found out I had 20/150 vision. They guessed it was because my eyes were not being used for so long, that I lost vision. They gave me some glasses to help me, but I don't need them anymore.

But nonetheless I could see now. I finally got to see the doctor treating me as she crept in through the door.

"I… I know you!" I hissed. I pointed at the woman, who was once a girl that I knew.

"Do you remember my name?" She asked me.

"N-no..." My voice was sore, and needed to rest, but it wished to say so much.

She gave a smirk, a pitiful smirk. "It figures. You killed so many people, I doubt you would remember someone like me." She paused. "But then again, it was my friend who led to your demise."

I remembered that fateful day. That man, no, that boy beat me. That ponytailed bastard beat me. His name, it almost escaped me.

"Shikamaru…" I whispered.

She frowned. "It would make sense that you would remember him more than me. But still I wish you remember me, little old Ino."

I didn't know how to respond to her at that point. So I simply said, "Stop nagging me." Though I soon wished she kept nagging because then she began to scold me.

"You don't even care do you? You don't care about all the people you killed. You don't care about all the lives you changed. I bet you don't even care about your old partner, Kakuzu. You're still as arrogant, and selfish, and foolish as you were when we saw you! The Hokage thought that with all this time you could've changed your ways. But no. You just keep being you're same old self. You-"

"Just leave me alone." I growled.

"Gladly." She huffed, and she left the room.

Now, at this point I had no idea about why the Hokage would think I had changed. I didn't know why that girl, Ino, was my doctor. Hell, I didn't even know why I was being treated for my wounds, and doing all sorts of tests. But the next day I found out the answer to all those questions.

While there were no nurses in the room, I tried to look around for any scalpels, or needles, or anything I could use to pray… Even though I had so much doubt in Jashin, I still needed my body to heal.

"Nothing… Nothing…. Nothing…" I murmured to myself while I checked every unlocked cabinet.

There was some knocking at the door, and I rushed to my bed.

"Come in!"

I was expecting a nurse… Even Dr. Ino… I expected anyone else, but him. He was silent when he came in, not even saying hi at first. Maybe he wanted to see my reaction to him before he reacted to me. Of course I didn't react too well to seeing him, damn Shikamaru…

"YOU!" I shouted, pointed at him accusingly. I jumped out of the hospital bed, and rushed at him.

I was still weak though. When I got close enough, he pushed me to the ground. I fell right on my ass.

"Get back in your bed." He said simply, but very aggressively.

I stood up. "Oh no! I'm not going to let you boss me around, after you ruined my damn life! You fucking bastard! You practically killed me, and-"

"Get back in your bed." He repeated. "Go before I get the nurses."

I still wanted to argue with him, but I didn't want to have another sedative. I returned to my bed, and I sighed. "So why the fucking hell are you even here?"

"The Hokage ordered me to study you." He answered.

"Study me?" I repeated dully. "Haven't that been what all of these nurse have been doing with all of these tests? Besides, why do you need to 'study me'?"

"There's a war going on right now." He paused. "So many people… Their lives are being wasted, Hidan."

"My life was wasted too you know. By you!" I hissed. "Why should I care about them? And what the fuck does that have to do with me?"

He grimaced and looked down. "I guess a person like you shouldn't be expected to care. But I care. Everyone who is studying you cares. Our village cares."

"I still don't see what this has to do with me. It's not like I'm killing them."

"I can't tell you very much information about why we're studying you, but I'll this for now."

I got frustrated about the secret. I just couldn't make the connection between some stupid war and me. Of course later I learned why, but I won't spoil it for you.

Shikamaru came to me the next day. He asked me some random general questions. Let me tell you what we talked about.

"What did you enjoy doing before we met?" He asked me.

"Huh? What I liked to do? Is this some sort of test or mind fuck thing?"

"No, no, I just want to get to know you better before I do some real studying."

"Um, okay. I enjoyed praying, killing, other Jashin themed thing." I paused for a second. "I really liked killing Asuma too."

Shikamaru tensed some, not too much though. It was clear that he wanted to keep his cool, but I wanted to press his buttons.

"He must've not been use to so much pain. It felt very nice. You know, the less pain a person is use to, the better it feels for me. It hurts them even more. It must've been hell for him. Burning him, stabbing his leg, piercing his stomach…"

He looked stiffer, his fist starting to ball up.

"The best part though-Oh! His heart, his dear heart. It felt sensational. It was lovely. It was the best. It was orgasmic, that pain. That stupid bastard was so weak and not use to real pain. I could've died from such pleasure." I smirked some. "Of course I didn't, but he did. Asuma sure did die, and it was great."

"Hidan…" Shikamaru said, stopping my long-winded talk. "Did you say it was 'orgasmic'? The pain you felt?"

I blushed some. "Yeah, it was."

"So it gave you sexual pleasure?"

I blushed more. "I didn't mean it like that!"

"Then how did you mean it?"

I realize now he was trying to turn the table, and make me feel angry and uncomfortable. But at the time, I was just embarrassed. I'm sure you could figure out that I had some masochist kinks in the bedroom. But I didn't want Shikamaru to know about it.

"Well… It's like when you eat something delicious and it's like that."

"I see." He said skeptical.

"It's not like that! I'm not like that!" As I said that I blushed more, and I realized that I was a horrible liar.

"Well off the subject of sexual activities, what did you think of your partner, Kakuzu?"

This was a very difficult question. On one hand I hated Kakuzu's greed, and the fact that he would not convert. But on the other hand, before he died, we were fuck buddies. (Yes, big shock right? I was gay, or should say am gay.) We were too different to be in a serious love-dovey relationship. I praise Jashin, and he praised money. He was like 80 or 90 something too, so there was a major age difference. He only seemed to want to fuck with me because he had no one else, plus he was too cheap for hookers.

I gave him a shrug. "I don't know. Even though we fought a lot, he was okay." I tried to conceal my true thoughts.

"Did you have any feelings for him? Good, bad, sexual-"

"Wait, wait, wait! You don't really think I had sexual feelings for that guy, do you? He was a greedy, good-for-nothing, shit head." I didn't want to tell him. I really didn't.

"Okay then." He responded.

After my reaction we steered away from love and sex. He started to ask about my favorites, words, color, animal, food, etc.

Eventually he asked me how old I was.

"Well…." I hesitated to answer because I didn't know. "I was twenty-two when you buried me, and I don't know how much time has passed… So I'm not sure."

He leaned back in his chair. "It's been far too long. It's been almost ten years since I dug your grave."

I was shocked. I couldn't even talk at first. Bu I final uttered something, "Ten years. Ten years!"

"Yes, I'm surprised you lived for so long." He said.

"Really? You're not bullshitting me are you? It's been ten years?"

He nodded, and yawned. "I think that's enough for today. I'll see you tomorrow."

He headed towards the door and left me astonished. Something weird happened to me right then. I felt this empty feeling… I now see that I was longing to see him, that I didn't want Shikamaru to leave me. But I denied those feelings, and decided it was time to get some well-deserved rest.

The next day he came back. He actually looked happy to see me… Not in a "oh I really wanted to see this person again" happy. It was more like a smug happiness.

"Hidan." He started to say. "I have a treat for you, but you have to come with me."

I perked up. "A treat? Please tell me it's some real food. They've been giving me shit here."

"No, it's not that. Just come with me."

I stumbled out of my bed, and I followed him to an empty room. It was a concrete room, painted a pale blue. There was no furniture, no windows, nothing. It was just empty.

I walked in, and Shikamaru closed the heavy door, locked it too.

"So what is this?" I asked. "Some sort of trap?"

"No, if anything it's a reward." He said. "Before I give your treat to you, I want to say something. I'm willing to use force on you. I don't care how much I hurt you, because you're so soulless. I could also get the nurses, or use a sedative. So be warned, that I will do anything to stop you."

"Stop me from what?" I raised a brow.

He reached behind him, into one of his leather bags. And what he got out, well, it was wonderful!

My eyes lit up, and I smiled. "My old pike!"

Yes, it was my pike, the one I used to stab my heart with. It was still as sharp as ever, and it was not even rusted. It looked polished too.

"The only reason you're getting this is to pray. Do you understand?"

"Yes-Yes!" I was beaming. The nostalgia of all the people I slaughter with it filled my heart. I was so happy, that I could explode. I loved that pike almost as much as my scythe.

He tossed it to me. "Just pray."

"You think that I'll really 'just pray' now?" I asked. I was so overjoyed, even started to giggle some. "How foolish that would be! To waste the perfect opportunity to butcher you up!"

"Hidan, did you not just listen to me?" Shikamaru said, he sounded angry. "I will hack away at your neck until there's no way of you putting it back on. So just pray, or you'll never see even a butter knife again."

And for once, I thought logically. I knew that my body was still weak. I was thin and almost blind. And Shikamaru, he was a strong as ever. I needed to heal before I would fight him, which was a fact.

"Tsk… Fine."

He looked surprised for a second, yet he kept calm over all. "Good."

I stabbed my hand, and drew the diagram. I couldn't tell until after I drew it that he was watching me, studying.

I laid on the cold hard floor, and stabbed my heart. I grinned even more because it just felt so good. I began to pray.

I don't really like telling people exactly what I pray for. It's like a wish for me. If you tell someone, then it won't come true. I like to think of my prayers like that. So I'll skip what I'm told Lord Jashin.

I felt more and more healthy the longer I took. My body was gaining muscle. My scarred organs were healing. Even my eyesight got better. Jashin had bestowed Jashin's gift of healing once more.

My eyes were closed during this time, to allow them to mend themselves even faster. But when I was done, I stared at Shikamaru. (I took my glasses off too, because otherwise it was as blurry as hell.) He looked at me in awe.

I took the pike out, and got off the freezing ground. "Were you not expecting this?"

"To be honest, no. I didn't think that you would heal so fast or so easily."

I gave a smug look. "Well, Lord Jashin is great like that." I through the blood covered pike back to him. "You'll want to wash that off."


End file.
